Chocolate anyone?

 

A new purchase and a philosophical new year’s post thrown into one. It would’ve also been a pick of the sales had the item still be in stock, but sadly it has been sold out. However, do have a look at New Look’s other clutches as there are some other whimsical ones, such as this champagne shaped purse.

I don’t believe I’ve done this before (written and uploaded a post on the same day, and late), but how very fitting that it’s a new year to have first times. Today my Asos order arrived much to my excitement. I had shown some self control and only bought two items from the sales. One was this chocolate bar clutch, which has exactly the playful and almost childlike disposition I love about fashion. Ironically, I have seem to lost my appetite recently. Perhaps it’s my body’s reaction to the excessive amount of food I consumed, almost without thought, during the Christmas and New Year period. I’m content enough with my chocolate clutch; there will be no more Lindt Milk Chocolate balls for me. 

And so I move on from fashion onto a more psychological rant. On New Year’s Day I underwent a reevaluation of the self which, interestingly, reminds me of the context topic we had for English last year. It was not so much a “mid-life crisis” of sorts but a new way of looking at myself; the values I stood for, my identity in the mind of others, my own perception of my identity. In doing so also thought about the new year and my intentions to enjoy and really live in 2015. 

A few of my yearnings involve a desire to learn, to feed the soul, to add warmth through knowledge and new information. To be full, not physically but spiritually. To experience new things. To step a little outside my comfort zone, but not so far that I do not recognise the face I see reflected in the mirror. All the things that seem so cliche, but have been clear in the thoughts I have had in the first five days of the year. Not so much promises or “resolutions” to do such and such, but of wanting “being” to be enough (inspired by the wise words of John Fowles). A life where there is something to take away from each day, of gratitude for life’s greatest moments and smallest frivolities. A life where I catch myself in a moment of laughter, in the fading light at sunset, or the slow return to reality after reading a book. Perhaps it’s the freedom of having finished school that allows such a “rebirth” (though I cringe as I type this word), of finally having the decision of how to live one’s life. Not being confined to a routined day, a syllabus that dictates what will be learnt, a set of rules, an honour to uphold for the institution. It’s almost like being alone and free in the world, though surrounded by the love of friends and family, where you guide your own happiness. 

I often find myself waiting so desperately for a particular event in the future that the days in between simply disappear into mass of nothingness. Living is not spared merely for the holidays or the weekend; living is everyday. It’s sitting on the couch watching television, it’s dancing from night into the next morning. Maybe living in the moment and not longing for tomorrow should be my “resolution”?

My sartorial and physical cravings seem to have been fulfilled, but it seems that it may take the year to satisfy my philosophical needs. May 2015 bring us all happiness, peace, fulfillment, thrill and just a little bit of crazy to keep us sane.